Japanese men and Chinese Women, marriage doesn't work Options

[TracyJacks]

http://mdn.mainichi-msn.co.jp/waiwai/news/...0dm026000c.html

Japanese husbands whine as neglected Chinese brides do a runner
Japan's increasingly prickly relations with China may have already captured headlines across the globe, but Spa! (4/11) reveals Sino-Japanese relations on a much more personal level -- marriage -- may be even more hostile. And the weekly says it's Japanese blokes who're to blame.

While more Japanese and Chinese couples are tying the knot in Japan than ever before -- some 12,000 married in 2004 -- divorce rates are skyrocketing, with one in three Sino-Japanese marital unions ending in failure.

Many Japanese guys are quick to blame the women, but independent observers say it's not that cut-and-dried.

"Chinese women are, like any other women, interested in marrying and becoming happy. They want their husbands to look after them. They want them to serve them their rice and find time on their days off to go for a drive together. They want praise and bright greetings when they wake up in the morning. That kind of communication is vital in a relationship," Hiroyuki Yoshioka, head of Aobado -- a company that brokers marriages with Chinese women for Japanese male clients -- tells Spa!

Another broker, speaking on condition of anonymity, says sex is the key for survival of Japanese-Chinese marriages.

"Many of the girls coming to Japan have grown up in the country and have only ever done it once. That was often with a guy they had been seeing for a long time, like half a year or so. These women consequently place an enormous value on having sex. After they marry, sex remains important as a way for their husband to physically express his love for her and, if there's no sex, trouble starts," the broker says. "But Japanese guys get married and turn sexless. Or, they can't get it up and want to use vibrators. They've got to make an effort to do things that will please their wives, like falling asleep while cupping their breasts and stuff."

Japanese men's approach toward marrying Chinese women has also copped a blast, with many adopting the attitude that they were simply "buying a bride," according to Makoto Hino$hita, the president of Yokohama Bridal Service, tells Spa! "There really are lots of people like that. Some people come to me complaining that they'd paid a lot of money and their wife had run off on them. Mind you, there was one case at another company where a guy whose wife left him after two years said: 'Well, if you figure it was like going to a brothel every night, then I got off cheap.' There are also loads of guys who come to us with, shall we say, problems of the heart. There are clearly some real mental cases. Often, though, men simply don't try to understand their partner. Loads of guys don't even try to remember a basic greeting in their wives' native language. But the biggest problem of all is with guys whose parents live with them. And in the countryside, parents almost always live with their eldest son."

Men in their 40s form the core of the international marriage brokerage business. In Japan's boonies, where women are already sparse, marriage brokers flood single middle-aged men with advertisements for their services via direct mail, newspaper leaflets and on buses and taxis.

"There're absolutely loads of guys, particularly in the country, who turn to Chinese women because Japanese women wouldn't look at them. Often these guys are being pressured by their parents to hurry up and get married and the guys respond by doing so at the first chance they get, for reasons like wanting to hurry up and produce a grandchild for their parents, or to produce a son of their own to take over the family business. That's why you get 'Well, I've got the money, so I'll buy myself a Chinese bride' mentality," a member of a matchmaking club arranging international marriages tells Spa! "If they're thinking like that, there's no way the marriage could possibly work. But then, when the marriage fails, the guys blame the brokers for finding someone who wasn't right for them." (By Ryann Connell)

err so, is it a turn on for women if guys cup your breast and fall asleep? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/icon_confused.gif)

This post has been edited by TracyJacks: Apr 21 2006, 07:50 AM

[n4ce12]

err so, is it a turn on for women if guys cup your breast and fall asleep? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/icon_confused.gif)

Its probably a hug thing

[Mightycandy]

http://mdn.mainichi-msn.co.jp/waiwai/news/...0dm026000c.html
err so, is it a turn on for women if guys cup your breast and fall asleep? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/icon_confused.gif)

typical Japanese farmers. or village idiots.

[Zezei]

pheeeew, I thought the article was about relationships between educated, independent chinese women and educated, social japanese guys.

luckily, it only says that marriages don't work out very well between chinese women who are attracted to the relatively comfy life in Japan and ugly japanese loser-types who have the money but not the social skills.

I feel for the chinese women who are often quite pretty to get stuck with these types. There's a probably a language-barrier too.


==
"Chinese women are, like any other women, interested in marrying and becoming happy. They want their husbands to look after them. They want them to serve them their rice and find time on their days off to go for a drive together. They want praise and bright greetings when they wake up in the morning. That kind of communication is vital in a relationship," Hiroyuki Yoshioka, head of Aobado -- a company that brokers marriages with Chinese women for Japanese male clients -- tells Spa!
===

yes, this is so true.


I think when people meet eachother 'spontaneously' and start seeing eachother because they're charmed of eachother, you'll get a relationship based on trust/equality/love/lust with good sex.


=====
From: Karen Sent: 5/17/2002 4:34 PM
Hmmm

Well, after some thought I have decided to reply to this posting

In my experience........

Japanese men are FANTASTIC at foreplay - they CANNOT be beaten at this. They really care about the woman during foreplay and are extremely unselfish and giving. They are more than happy to spend a very long time building up to sex and do everything possible to make sure the woman has had AT LEAST 1 ORGASM during this time.

As for harder erections, probably no difference, can't say I have noticed any difference. HOWEVER, Japanese men are more affected by alcohol than western men ie a little beer will cause a Japanese man to lose his erection quicker than a western man.

Karen
=====


kekeke

[education]

^Never thought I see the day when I would witness Zeizei actually criticizing japanese. Who knows Zeizei might even have something negative to say about japanese fashion but I think I might be getting ahead of myself here.

This post has been edited by education: Apr 21 2006, 09:58 AM

[susan12]

Sino-Japanese event was a past. We should not look back at the histroy and continuously hate each other.

[toki]

"says sex is the key for survival of Japanese-Chinese marriages."

uhh. what... i have trouble accepting that as a truth . sorry.

[Takashi]

^ tee hee. good sex does go a long way in any relationship (IMG:style_emoticons/default/icon_wink.gif)

it puts you in a good mood, which affects your attitude in general and therefore people in good moods=deal with problems in a relationship better=get along better=better relationship. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/icon_wink.gif)

In a marriage yes but there are plenty of people in successful relationships that dont believe in sex before marriage (IMG:style_emoticons/default/icon_confused.gif)

[toki]

^ tee hee. good sex does go a long way in any relationship (IMG:style_emoticons/default/icon_wink.gif)

it puts you in a good mood, which affects your attitude in general and therefore people in good moods=deal with problems in a relationship better=get along better=better relationship. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/icon_wink.gif)

yeah.. sex is important in marriage. but why does it specifically say that for a chinese/japanese relationship it seems important.. ehh. i dont trust this article (IMG:style_emoticons/default/shifty.gif) i always thought that kroean men and chinese woman were sort of a mismatch too. but for different reasons i think

This post has been edited by toki: Apr 21 2006, 11:17 AM

[Takashi]

i always thought that kroean men and chinese woman were sort of a mismatch too. but for different reasons i think

care to elaborate?

[toki]

care to elaborate?

lol. later. thats just what some people from experience told me, etc. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/embarassedlaugh.gif)

[Takashi]

lol. later. thats just what some people from experience told me, etc. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/embarassedlaugh.gif)

not later, later means never, I'm still waiting on that report (IMG:style_emoticons/default/Talktohand.gif)

[TracyJacks]

lol. later. thats just what some people from experience told me, etc. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/embarassedlaugh.gif)

no, Toki, I want to know NOW (IMG:style_emoticons/default/shifty.gif)

is there something wrong with chinese women?

i hear that japanese men and korean men have this stereotype that chinese women don't do as much housework and are more career-oriented but thats because in china, all women work, even when they get married and have kids. unless the woman marries a rich guy, she most likely has to work as well and its hard to manage all the household tasks when you work fulltime.

[Takashi]

i hear that japanese men and korean men have this stereotype that chinese women don't do as much housework and are more career-oriented but thats because in china, all women work, even when they get married and have kids. unless the woman marries a rich guy, she most likely has to work as well and its hard to manage all the household tasks when you work fulltime.

Korean and Japanese women do as well.......................

[SsangOhChill]

You guys are missing the important issue:

"is it a turn on for women if guys cup your breasts and fall asleep? "

[Adee]

i always thought that kroean men and chinese woman were sort of a mismatch too. but for different reasons i think

What about Chinese men and Korean women? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/love2.gif)

[Takashi]

What about Chinese men and Korean women? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/love2.gif)

'Among Korean women who married foreigners, 42.2% chose Chinese, 30.8% selected Japanese husbands, and 11.8% tied the knot with American men'

[Manun]

So viagra is the answer?

[Adee]

'Among Korean women who married foreigners, 42.2% chose Chinese, 30.8% selected Japanese husbands, and 11.8% tied the knot with American men'

I'm asking what toki thinks (IMG:style_emoticons/default/Talktohand.gif)

[Takashi]

I'm asking what toki thinks (IMG:style_emoticons/default/Talktohand.gif)

toki = taken (IMG:style_emoticons/default/Talktohand.gif)