QUOTE
1. Your standards for evaluation are limited to "not bad" (bwe-phai) and good enough" (ham-ham) <--LOL YES!
2. You count every single centavo that comes in and out of your wallet <--being kuripot is hiphop.
3. You watched the PROC National Day celebration on Sky/Home Cable
4. You watch the old Chinese variety shows on CTV and the rest of the Chinese channels on cable.
5. You voted Fred Lim for president
6. People have told you, "Magaling ka pala magtagalog." (dito kaya ako pinanganak?) <--obviously not, if you've ever read my tagalog.
7. You're the prime target of 'kotong cops' in Binondo <--hell no. if they tried anything i'd tell my a-mah to buy their family business. better yet, their families mismo.
8. You make today's rice tomorrow's fried rice <--umm no, today's rice is eaten. i grew up believing that wasted rice will make jesus madd at you and therefore i'd be sent to hell.
9. Today's leftovers are tastefully mixed in tomorrow's bi-hun or ma-mi <--we don't cook our own noodles.
10.The only thing you can read in a Chinese daily is the daily's name (so sue me!) <--lol. basically. but i try to learn as much chinese as i can.
11. Your pinoy f! riends ask for tikoy from you, and they're more excited eating it than you are (now they ask for different flavors of tikoy pa!) <--actually our filipino friends are the ones giving us the tikoy (which we don't eat because it's hard to eat 20 boxes a year...)
12. You aren't allowed to wear black, although you want to - to look thinner <--EXACTLY. LOL. I have 1 black shirt in my entire closet and I only wear it on days where luck is not needed. I remember I was going to wear the shirt when we moved $hit into my bro's dorm, but then I realized that it might bring bad luck into his dorm so I wore a BRIGHT RED shirt instead.
13. Your family car's plate number begins with 8 <--LOL no. but if we could, it'd be «8888-888» LOL. we always manage to get 4's in license plates and address names though. ugh!!! no wonder we're so unlucky all the time lol.
14. When you speak to an elder and you forget the chinese term for a particular item, and say "ahhh hio-nge hio-nge hio-nge basta hio-nge la!" (nyahahaha) <--um, no. my mom just says it in tagalog. my dad's chinese is pretty good (better than his tagalog) so when he forgets something he can't use tagalog so he busts out his chavacano. LOL. it's like blah blah blah blah HUGE SPANISH WORD blah blah blah
15. Your friends greet your parents "a-pe or am-a, good evening!" <--no. my mom is mom and my dad is dad. my grandma, however, is a-ma, and my brother is a-hia.
16. You end up being the tour guide everytime you and your Pinoy friends make an expedition to Binondo. <--binondo is GHETTO.
17. You went bananas when Jackie Chan, Chow Yun Fat and Jet Lee went international
18. You affix "-la", "-lo" to your Pinoy/Taglish sentences <--NEVER, EVER, EVER. that's a crime.
19. You affix "ba", "naman" or "pa" to your Chinese sentences <--LOL. <3
20. Your food vocab! ulary consists of ...kiam-pong, cha-pong, am-beh, mi-sua, cha-sio, ma-ki-mi, hee-chee, machang <--i don't know what half that stuff is, but sure. i bet i know what they're called in tagalog though. LOL.
21. Your parents think that a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship is the same as getting married <--*nods* not fun... can't blame them for caring so mmuch about my life thugh. it can only be a good thing.
22. You Speak chinese at home, speak Filipino with friends, and write letters in English! <--no. english at home, english with friends and letters in portuguese. my dad is chinese at home, tagalog with friends, and horribly written letters in english. my mom is tagalog at home, tagalog with friends and letters in tagalog.
23. You talk a lot at home but when relatives from China come to stay, you become as meek as a goat around them and all you say is "Ho", "Tampo", "Eh Hiaw" <--'gua bo ai kong' anything in 'lannang oeh' int he first place.. so you could say i'm meek around chinese people.
we don't even have any relatives from fujian. jsut from HK.
24. You love Lao Fu Zi even if you could never figure out what they were talking about
25. You know the beneficial effects of chrysanthemum tea and black duck soup <--yes. and my kids will be eating black chicken soup too. chrysanthemum tea is gross though. i'm not making anyone dirnk that.
26. You say "Wa-kah-nga !" or "In-yah-kwee-yah!" <--YEESSSSSSS! WAAAAAAAAH KAAAAANG AAAAH... LOL that's like the only thing i say in chinese.
27. You've eaten food after it has been offered to your dead ancestors <--once every few months. i remember once we were making an offering and the offering table collapsed and all this beer spilling onto the couch beside it. omg. i was laughing my @$$ off. all that broken glass.. fruit all over the floor... lechon and manok and $hit.. ahahahaha... all on the floor. offerings are fun though. you have to flip two 1 piso coins and depending on how they land your ancestors are done eating or are still eating. lol. and there's the smell of incense all around the house...
28. You pronounce "C" or "K" sounds like "KH" like "khas" instead of cash, "khomputer" for computer (oy hinde ha) <--we don't even use the 'kh' sound in hokkien. which is totally wrong. my mom pronounces 'tiy' and 'ts' in hokkien as 'ch' which is VERY wrong. lol. no one understands her sometimes. it's kinda funny. fu-king taglaog @$$ accent ahahaha
29. You have a cough, and your mom insists that you drink 'ki-pe-lo'and for stomack ache,'tsing-lo-ing' (effective naman kasi)
30. When seated around a chinese lauriat, you insist back and forth that other people take the first serving (basta kung kanino natapat, siya mauna!)
31. You mix the hard-boiled egg cooked in adobo (lo-neng) with your rice.
32. Tinutusok mo nalang iyong fish/meat/squid ball with your chopsticks! <--WHAT!? never pierce anything with a chopstick. that's so fu-king disrespectful!!?!
33. Kung hindi mo na matusok ang fish/meat/squid ball with ur chopstick, kinakamay mo nalang. <--lol better.
34. Your parents (esp. the mother) claim they're both Buddhist/Taoist and Christian!!!! <--my mom is a hardcore catholic. lol. dad is like atheist or some $hit. grandma is buddhist though.
35. You have to work on the 24th, 25th, 30th, and 31st of December.
36. You had culture shock in college.
37. Your pinoy friends ask for ! the chinese translation of 'i love you" and certain curse words
38. You go to Hap Chan for a mid-night snack
39. The only first aid kit you bring with you is white flower.
40. You think the center of life in the Philippines is around the 3 mile radius of Binondo church (ay hindi naman ) <--no, the center of life in the philippines is greenhills, corinthians, wack-wack, and arcadia.
41. You are a tsinoy, when in math class, you mumble the Chinese multiplication table when mutiplying numbers.
Ex. Di it Di (2x1=2) ; Di Di Si (2x2=4)
42. If you are male, you have a name that ends with "-son", i.e.
jefferson,emerson, wilson, harrison, stevenson, michaelson, kingson <--LMFAO! I KNOW PLENTY AHAHAHA... plus, my middle name is jason. but that's not fobby -__-V
43. You understand why "kai-shao" is more complicated than a "blind date"
44. The first reaction from new pinoy friends is "mayayaman ang mga intsik!" <--what the HELLL!??!? lmao
45. At least one member of ur family has already gone to Chientan
46.! You greet a friend on the phone by asking if he's eaten (dee chia beh?) or what he is doing (leh tshong shia?) <--parents do that a lot. not me. how corny...
47. You say: a. 'kain ng gamot' instead of 'inom ng gamot' (chia iyo kasi eh) b. 'hugas ng picture' instead of 'pa-develop ng picture' (swesiong kasi) <--um no. lol. in my family we say 'dim iyo' (drink) not 'chia iyo'. probably why most hokkien people think we're retarded LOL. and we have no idea how to say 'develop a picture' in chinese aahahaha...
48. All your non-filipino/non-tsinoy friends say "You don't look Filipino" when you tell them you were born in the Philippines.
49. You speak three different languages in one sentence. (e.g. "Di be go mamaya ba?") <--all the fu-king time.
2. You count every single centavo that comes in and out of your wallet <--being kuripot is hiphop.
4. You watch the old Chinese variety shows on CTV and the rest of the Chinese channels on cable.
5. You voted Fred Lim for president
6. People have told you, "Magaling ka pala magtagalog." (dito kaya ako pinanganak?) <--obviously not, if you've ever read my tagalog.
7. You're the prime target of 'kotong cops' in Binondo <--hell no. if they tried anything i'd tell my a-mah to buy their family business. better yet, their families mismo.
8. You make today's rice tomorrow's fried rice <--umm no, today's rice is eaten. i grew up believing that wasted rice will make jesus madd at you and therefore i'd be sent to hell.
9. Today's leftovers are tastefully mixed in tomorrow's bi-hun or ma-mi <--we don't cook our own noodles.
10.The only thing you can read in a Chinese daily is the daily's name (so sue me!) <--lol. basically. but i try to learn as much chinese as i can.
11. Your pinoy f! riends ask for tikoy from you, and they're more excited eating it than you are (now they ask for different flavors of tikoy pa!) <--actually our filipino friends are the ones giving us the tikoy (which we don't eat because it's hard to eat 20 boxes a year...)
12. You aren't allowed to wear black, although you want to - to look thinner <--EXACTLY. LOL. I have 1 black shirt in my entire closet and I only wear it on days where luck is not needed. I remember I was going to wear the shirt when we moved $hit into my bro's dorm, but then I realized that it might bring bad luck into his dorm so I wore a BRIGHT RED shirt instead.
13. Your family car's plate number begins with 8 <--LOL no. but if we could, it'd be «8888-888» LOL. we always manage to get 4's in license plates and address names though. ugh!!! no wonder we're so unlucky all the time lol.
14. When you speak to an elder and you forget the chinese term for a particular item, and say "ahhh hio-nge hio-nge hio-nge basta hio-nge la!" (nyahahaha) <--um, no. my mom just says it in tagalog. my dad's chinese is pretty good (better than his tagalog) so when he forgets something he can't use tagalog so he busts out his chavacano. LOL. it's like blah blah blah blah HUGE SPANISH WORD blah blah blah
15. Your friends greet your parents "a-pe or am-a, good evening!" <--no. my mom is mom and my dad is dad. my grandma, however, is a-ma, and my brother is a-hia.
18. You affix "-la", "-lo" to your Pinoy/Taglish sentences
19. You affix "ba", "naman" or "pa" to your Chinese sentences <--LOL. <3
20. Your food vocab! ulary consists of ...kiam-pong, cha-pong, am-beh, mi-sua, cha-sio, ma-ki-mi, hee-chee, machang <--i don't know what half that stuff is, but sure. i bet i know what they're called in tagalog though. LOL.
21. Your parents think that a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship is the same as getting married <--*nods* not fun... can't blame them for caring so mmuch about my life thugh. it can only be a good thing.
22. You Speak chinese at home, speak Filipino with friends, and write letters in English! <--no. english at home, english with friends and letters in portuguese.
my dad is chinese at home, tagalog with friends, and horribly written letters in english. my mom is tagalog at home, tagalog with friends and letters in tagalog.23. You talk a lot at home but when relatives from China come to stay, you become as meek as a goat around them and all you say is "Ho", "Tampo", "Eh Hiaw" <--'gua bo ai kong' anything in 'lannang oeh' int he first place.. so you could say i'm meek around chinese people.
we don't even have any relatives from fujian. jsut from HK.25. You know the beneficial effects of chrysanthemum tea and black duck soup <--yes. and my kids will be eating black chicken soup too. chrysanthemum tea is gross though. i'm not making anyone dirnk that.
26. You say "Wa-kah-nga !" or "In-yah-kwee-yah!" <--YEESSSSSSS! WAAAAAAAAH KAAAAANG AAAAH... LOL that's like the only thing i say in chinese.
27. You've eaten food after it has been offered to your dead ancestors <--once every few months. i remember once we were making an offering and the offering table collapsed and all this beer spilling onto the couch beside it. omg. i was laughing my @$$ off. all that broken glass.. fruit all over the floor... lechon and manok and $hit.. ahahahaha... all on the floor. offerings are fun though. you have to flip two 1 piso coins and depending on how they land your ancestors are done eating or are still eating. lol. and there's the smell of incense all around the house...
30. When seated around a chinese lauriat, you insist back and forth that other people take the first serving (basta kung kanino natapat, siya mauna!)
32. Tinutusok mo nalang iyong fish/meat/squid ball with your chopsticks! <--WHAT!? never pierce anything with a chopstick. that's so fu-king disrespectful!!?!
33. Kung hindi mo na matusok ang fish/meat/squid ball with ur chopstick, kinakamay mo nalang. <--lol better.
36. You had culture shock in college.
37. Your pinoy friends ask for ! the chinese translation of 'i love you" and certain curse words
38. You go to Hap Chan for a mid-night snack
39. The only first aid kit you bring with you is white flower.
40. You think the center of life in the Philippines is around the 3 mile radius of Binondo church (ay hindi naman ) <--no, the center of life in the philippines is greenhills, corinthians, wack-wack, and arcadia.
Ex. Di it Di (2x1=2) ; Di Di Si (2x2=4)
42. If you are male, you have a name that ends with "-son", i.e.
jefferson,emerson, wilson, harrison, stevenson, michaelson, kingson <--LMFAO! I KNOW PLENTY AHAHAHA... plus, my middle name is jason. but that's not fobby -__-V
44. The first reaction from new pinoy friends is "mayayaman ang mga intsik!" <--what the HELLL!??!? lmao
46.! You greet a friend on the phone by asking if he's eaten (dee chia beh?) or what he is doing (leh tshong shia?) <--parents do that a lot. not me. how corny...
47. You say: a. 'kain ng gamot' instead of 'inom ng gamot' (chia iyo kasi eh) b. 'hugas ng picture' instead of 'pa-develop ng picture' (swesiong kasi) <--um no. lol. in my family we say 'dim iyo' (drink) not 'chia iyo'. probably why most hokkien people think we're retarded LOL. and we have no idea how to say 'develop a picture' in chinese aahahaha...
48. All your non-filipino/non-tsinoy friends say "You don't look Filipino" when you tell them you were born in the Philippines.
49. You speak three different languages in one sentence. (e.g. "Di be go mamaya ba?") <--all the fu-king time.
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