You probably all know by now about my beginning in the music industry. I had a fan base that started from those early days singing at Ritz Nightclub, since 1983. The song that brought me closest to you, in my opinion, was Mua Tren Bien Vang, although the two videotapes, very time-consuming, not to mention exhausting, to produce, also provided breakthrough for me professionally. Yet even after I became famous, I was always overcome with emotions when one of you showed even the slightest bit of appreciation over my performances. I was continually trying to improve so as to be deserving of your acceptance. Even after I became very ill and almost incapacitated, performing in a new (third) video was always on my mind. I wanted to give back to all my listeners who continued to write to wish me well. By the way, an apology is owed to all of you who wrote and sent flowers and best wishes to me the entire time I was ill: please forgive me for not replying to all of you, though you were all in my thoughts.

On to a topic many of you have questions: my medical condition. What happened to Ngoc Lan? One of the things that makes me glad about having this page is it gives me the chance to clarify things about my illness. What I had is a condition called Multiple Sclerosis, a degenerative disease that entailed the “body attacking itselfâ€�. You’ve heard about cells attacking the nerve tissues, causing progressive disability. It has to do with the body’s immune system receiving some miscues somewhere, or even “being trickedâ€� into attacking the cells that are good for our bodies. I first noticed something amiss in 1993, when I woke up one morning not being able to see anything in the room. It was a frightening episode, but then it passed quickly, and I carried on with my life, you know, recording songs, performing live at shows. It was also during this time that my sister and most devoted fan, Thao Chuyen, was violently taken from our family during a robbery. She had been one of the anchors of my life, having encouraged me in my early days trying to make a go at a singing career. Needless to say, it was a period of devastating sadness in my life. So you see, I really had no time to care for myself. It was not until 1994 that I sought medical help. Since Asians rarely suffer from this condition, the doctors did not suspect MS for a long time. Hindsight is always perfect, so I don’t know if the outcome of my life might have changed if I had seen a doctor sooner, or if a correct diagnosis had been made more quickly, or if I hadn’t worked so hard on the videos, neglecting my health … . But there’s no point in discussing all those “ifsâ€�, is there? I just know that my condition worsened pretty quickly after diagnosis. Eventually I came to depend on my husband, Kelvin Khoa, and my family, especially my beloved mother and younger sister, Phuong Thao, in navigating my increasingly difficult day-to-day life. When you all heard that I had passed away, on March 6, 2001, I was “thereâ€� to witness your formidable show of love to me. Thousands of you came to say goodbye, while many more sent their condolences to my family. As they say, death is always hardest on those surviving, and this was no exception. In a sense, I was relieved to be rid of my disability, which was increasingly robbing me of my independence as a human being; still, seeing so much pain I left behind was excruciating sorrow!