The USA is a free country where you can say everything you want. Indeed the government is so interested in what you have to say that it secretly listens telephone conversations and reads your e-mails. If that you have to say is important enough, it will interview you personally, and even give you a ticket for vacations to some cool destination like Guantanamo Bay, secret CIA prisons, foreign torture sites, Heaven, Limbo or Paradise. So remember, just say it! But don't talk about this because it's a top secret, and that's way uncool, really.
This article may be Overly American. Brits may not understand humor, only humour. Don't change a thing to remedy this.
Though the United States' new strategy in Iraq has proven effective at routing insurgent rebels, it has done little to relieve the stigma of what many percieve as American imperialism.
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called-experts at Wikipedia have an article about United States of America.
"I'm a-gonna liberate-a you!"
~ Little American on the guy who stole his money
“I pity the fools who are American!”
~ Mr. T on United States of America
“Anyone smell sulphur?”
~ Hugo Chavez on United States of America
"Give yourselves up you big, runny, capitalist dogs!!"
~ Anonymous, probably North Korean man on United States of America
"fu-k YEAH!"
~ Team America on United States of America
“Smoking is bad for your body”
~ Cigarette producers
“I feel like America tonight! America tonight!”
~ Ronald McDonald on United States of America
“In Soviet Russia, America hates YOU!!”
~ Yakov Smirnoff on United States of America
United States of America = Satane Dictatore, Fuse Mei!
A latin sentence which means: Satan dictator, fuse with me!
At the moment this country appears to have no redeeming value and so is a candidate for deletion and/or nuking. If this country isn't improved in 7 years it may be nuked. However, this country may have potential and with a better president it could become fit to stay.
Please don't remove this notice unless the country has been significantly improved. If you would like to dispute the placement of this tag, please follow these instructions. Not following them may have severe consequences.
The United States of America
United Statesian flag
United Statesian Coat of Fat Arms and Legs
Motto Semper ubi sub ubi
The United States as of the Treaty of Boston (2087 AD)
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The United States as of the Treaty of Boston (2087 AD)
Who let the dogs out?
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Who let the dogs out?
Official languages United Statesian, United Statesian Spanish, United Statesian Japanese, Propaganda, 1337, N*gga, Newspeak, English
Race 0.00000000334044984% Assmonkey
Religion Capitalism, Paganism, Feminism, Jeesus!, Mormons, Amish
Czars Futurama, Mexicans, Anime, Everything in Walmart, Cocaine, Sex
Opening hours Monday–Saturday from dawn 'til midnight, Friday is ladies' night
Independence 2031 (end of Canadian Occupation)
National anthem "Xenu save the Queen", "Team America soundtrack".
Natural Resources Texas Tea, tree stumps, Jell-O™, prostitution, Actors
Official Cuisine Bacon fat, Freedom Fries, Hamburgers
National bird The B-3 Bomber
Capital City Vakuf (Bosnia), Washington
Contents
History
Main article: genocide.
America's history has been characterised by genocide, slavery, oppression, use of nuclear bombs, endless death and fu-king up other countries. Yes, this God-blessed land was discovered in 1952 by Mr McDonald and buisness partner KFC who both shared a vision of inhabiting a large country with millions of fat asses. The fat asses would star in stupid sitcoms like Friends and Will and Grace just so the rest of the world (apart from Russia) could laugh at their low level of intelligence.
America is a wonderful country that consists mainly of overweight people who won't let go of their burgers. They created McDonald's, which is the reason why so many people in the world are fat. Many presidents, world wide, are willing to start a petition involving the slaughter of Americans to feed the hungry people who live in poverty. Their infamous fastfood restaurants will never be erased from history.
America became the second most powerful country in the world (behind Britain) when Ronald McDonald was elected emperor in 1987. After a massive McDonalds advertisement drive, the population spent an entire year's wages on Big Macs. Consequently, America's military budget swelled to a massive $2, and the average American belt size swelled to a massive 45". Due to this increase in population mass, the world, not including Britain, announced America to be too powerful. This was mainly due to the fear of Americans trying to leave the country and getting stuck on economy airlines where seat widths are only 24", and planes would become overcramped. Consequently the resultant bodily odours would incapacitate airline staff, forcing planes to crash into more cultured parts of the world than America.
Culture (or lack thereof)
Main article: American Culture (an empty, but extremely accurate, article)
The U.S. is a "united" commonwealth populated by Republicans and illegal immigrants. Americans claim that their nation is favored by God, an allegation God vehemently denies.
Despite the relatively large geographic area, there are few museums or other repositories of culture and art to be found in the U.S. The government started The Library of Congress which quickly filled up with porn and Mad Magazines. The Smithsonian Institute is the U.S.'s most popular museum as it holds artifacts from old U.S. Television shows. The Southern United States keeps its heritage alive at the Great Library of Alexandria, and the Getty Museum in Los Angeles holds the U.S.'s collection of stolen works from other countries. There are no plans for any more collections.
Cultural activities for the Average American typically involve ingesting huge quantities of coke, which they are forced to drink cold.
The visitor is cautioned not to mention the name "Yu Es Ehy" to an inebriated American. "Yu Es Ehy" was a Chinese woman who is said to have had a mad affair with former American Rockstar John Lennon, thereby infuriating American senior citizens at large. They are often seen vehemently chanting her name at various sporting events. While, from an anthropological viewpoint, this display is fascinating to watch, it has also been known to be the cause of The Great 1927 Riot of Poughkeepsie, NY. The observer is cautioned to beware of his/her surroundings at all times, especially if they are of Chinese ancestry.
It is interesting to notice that people from United States of America call the country America, which is the name of the whole continent where the US lies on. It proves that United Statesians (as they should properly be called) lack geographical knowledge, want to conquer the world, and/or are just a bunch of stupid fat @$$ Homer Simpsons and Michael Browns.Or Canada, and Mexico are just thought of as insignificant, just like the rest of the world does.
And remember, being stupid is not a privilege. It is a right protected by the US Constitution Amendment of 1984.
Being a fat @$$, however, is a privilege. The United Statesian Emperor has the power to revoke said privilege at any time, under USC 900.64; violators will be towed to the nearest detention camp at owner's expense.
It is often assumed that the denominations of Chritianity in the U.S. make it the most common religion in the country. However, all "Americans" actually practice the "economic state turn personal and spiritual religious sacrifice" of "Capitalism." Most people follow this religion unaware that they are doing so (this is due to the overwhelmingly mandated need for $$$$$$$.) Nonetheless, the entire culture is gradually infected by the greed and overconsumption until the little green pieces of paper become the gross currency idol which symbolizes all the pestuous evils of the contemporary Roman Empire.
The country is ruled by a president who by constitutional law must be an old white land owning and male and holds supreme power in one hand and a mind control pill in the other. It is widely known that the President is not always the one who can afford to buy the most votes while still being able to pay off the cops not to not put them in the iron jug for three years.
As they have a carefully set up form of democracy where voting is not compulsory, most Americans will only vote if there's nothing good on TV. And with "quality" shows like Family Guy, American Idol, Punk'd and Flavor of Love, they wont be voting no time soon.
This ability of voters to vote is called referendum, or ref for short. These refs closely monitor all competitions and carefully regulate what's allowed to be said and what's not. America has become an Oceania-like continent, in this respect.
America is not viewed as one of the world's finest contributions
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America is not viewed as one of the world's finest contributions
Cultural diversity has had a huge role in the fostering of American society. Goths, typically garbed in black clothing with the orientation of "bi," they make up for the most depressed ten percent of society. The preps or jocks beat them up, which is reminiscent of American history. The Indians were persecuted because of their Hindu beliefs and bovine worshiping. When the Founding Fathers came over on the Union Pacific Railroad, from Africa, they settled New York and formed an anti-Parisian legislature. They then began the slow and steady holocaust of the India folk, and pushed them west towards the Indian Ocean. Afterwards, they all had a Samuel L. Jackson beer, named for Samuel L Jackson, leader and proprietor of the Sons of Liberty, a hokey third generation partisan clan of feathered tar babies. He is mostly known for have having it with those motherfu-king snakes on that motherfu-king plane now and days. World renowned historian Thomas Lunden quotes, "Sam Jackson was the drink of the day. After they would rid the world of tea forever, they'd kick back a cold one and make fun of all the stupid Tories."
Military
The US military is among the best biggest in the world. It is an stop-lossed all volunteer force equipped with the best armor in the world armor matching hats and well maintained vehicles vehicles boots, supported by little stickers on SUVs Republicans the American people to follow the unlawful orders of the Commander in Chief.
Politics (or lack therof)
The American Government is modeled after that of the Galactic Republic. Each of the states, plus Coca-Cola, McDonalds, Wal-Mart and the town of St. Joseph, Missouri (in thanks for giving them Eminem) sends one ambassador to the senate. These ambassadors are given the title 'Jar Jar' and are required by law to refer to themselves as 'Meesa' and their fellow ambassadors as 'Yousa'.
The President, when sworn in, is required to promised that he will strive to follow in the footsteps of the glorious Palpatine. He serves for a term of four years or until he is killed by his asthmatic underling. He rules from the Death Star (which a hot air balloon tethered over Washington). The current president, George Bush, is currently under criticism for behaving less and less like Palpatine and for hiding in a treehouse throughout the Hurricane Katrina disaster. Needless to say, the President's poll numbers fell dramatically, but rose again once he had the previous pollsters frozen in Carbonite.
Technically the United States is a dictatorship, since all branches of the government are controlled by the President. But it is called a democracy because people can do whatever they please, which usually is limited to such activities such as blowing monkeys, buying country western CD's, worshiping their Lord Alec Baldwin and running over each other in their huge SUV's, which is hardly ever a threat to the power structure. Bill Clinton was the first president to have his blowjob in the Oval Office publicized, yet it is commonly supported knowledge that every president receives a tax-free blowjob in the Oval Office after their inauguration by the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, or Monica Lewinsky.
American "Geography"
For more information about American cities and states, see the main article: American city-states
There are 22 penises (but sadly only one hand) in the USA Map. But they're all short.
California may also count as a vagina.
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California may also count as a vagina.
The Geography of the USA consists of mostly land. Although some lakes and rivers exist inside but these are mostly inhabited by Native American fishtails.
The circles on the above map show high concentrations of idiocy, obesity, idleness and other such American traits.
Language
The official languages of the United States of America are Newspeak, Texan, a mixture between Mandarin and Spanish developed by Francis the Fart in mid 17th century, and Propaganda, with a minority of people speaking ghetto slang:
The west-side dialect:"Smoke some bloods and pop some caps, i hizzeard that $hitnizzle all up in the four way ya nah? Those cracker frackers be all up in ym grill drinking gin 'n juice ma fu-ka? ya heard?"
The east-side dialect:"Fizzle Dizzle ma Nizzle fo Shizzle, he Mizzled ma Girlizzle all up i ma Bedizzle, made a Messizzle now my Bedizziles all Stickizzle"
Whitie cracka's:"Boi! Ya nah wha im sayin? Ya nah wha im sayin? Ya nah wha im sayin? Ya nah wha im sayin? DO Ya nah wha im sayin????"
The Rest:"Like, Duh... ... ... ... ..."
A minor second language, "Not my mother tongue" is spoken by angsty Germans. Inexplicably, despite not residing in the Americas they all still live there.
There is debate amongst the member states of the UN as to whether America actually controls the organization. This is, of course, complete nonsense as it is common forbidden knowledge that the Illuminati controls the UN along with every other international organization.
The average American does not have an opinion as to who controls the UN because they don't realize they're actually people on the other side of the oceans. A common misconception, one that undoubtedly everyone has heard at one time or another, is that languages are the prime barriers in communication.
The Free Masons get around this by not speaking a spoken language, rather by speaking an unspoken language that they don't have to speak. The Free Masons control the world, and they regulate the languages and words that are allowed to be filtered into society.
Noted botanist George Orwell writes, "I don't know what this Newspeak is, but I don't like it."
{{Q|I don't know who George Orwell is.|Oscar Wilde]]
Culture
Thanks to iniciatives taken by US president George "bam bam" Bush, Americans have become intrested in learning about the terra incognita they call "the world". They have been recently interested in high cultures like, arts and other langueges. In fact, the avrage american speaks 3-4 lenguages. All thanks to the new program entitled Educayshun. Also, the index of phisicly fit americans has risen to 98%. This was probably achived by renaiming the standard for a healthy figure to that of a adult blue whale.
National Philosophy
U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!
1945-1990: If you don't like america = Bloodsucking Communist.
2001-present: If you don't like america = Bloodsucking Oh-sa-muh Byn lahdun friend.
People with turbans: Dangerous. Solution: Attack and conquer them, make them democracies even if they don't want to be.
Driving
Typical American parking sign
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Typical American parking sign
Tourists from more civilized realms should remember that American motorists have a tendency to drive on the right (ie. wrong according to self-rightous Britons) side of the "highway" - or road as it's more properly called.
Law mandates that slower moving traffic must stick to the left-hand lanes on the freeway (motorway). Turn signals (indicators) must not be used and driving through red lights is compulsory. Cars have been deprecated in favor of SUVs, which must get less than 25 miles per gallon. In California, minimum speed limits of 75 MPH are enforced on the freeway by invisible radar traps. The correct way to greet another road user is a long blast on the horn followed by a friendly "fu-k you, @$$hole!"
After the War of Independence, the "Yankees" adopted this new protocol in imitation of the French, whom they clearly admire so much, and in gratitude for the statue of a lady with a torch. 'Oh, thank you, Frenchies.' Americans of the day cried. 'You're so cool, and all, that we're going to copy your independent ways. P.S. Don't forget to call us if ever you're in trouble.'
Driving on the right made the British very cross and grumpy. The British King George the Third shook his fist and shouted 'grrr, damn you, get over to the other side of the road'. Before he was hit by a huge SUV being driven by a fat American who was to busy munching his McDonalds and reading his car manual upside down to notice George's fat Royal head. Oh, how he cried!
Teenagers may commence drivers-education at 14 years, 8 months and 7 days. At this point they are forced to read a six page handbook (probably the greatest difficulty for any aspiring driver during the whole educational program.)
Foreign Policy
The world in USA's vision.
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The world in USA's vision.
United Statesian foreign policy is often limited to wiping their enormous d!cks all over the faces of their enemies and naysayers. Generally, people and countries who do not agree with this philosophy "have small weiners, are gay, are French, or have ulterior motives". Most often, policies include various combinations of "Blow the fu-kers up!" and "Make jokes based on stereotypes".
* Jokes about the English should involve references to teeth, because it is a true fact that all English people have yellow teeth and are super gay (true). Including you.
* Joke involving the Scottish is that they are the drink lots of beer and scotch, which is true.
* Jokes about the French should involve references to freedom and not supporting the USA destroy the world.
* New Federal Law mandating that the everything be stripped of the adjective "French" and replaced with "freedom", people found violating the law were put to death or exiled to to the freedom city of Paris.
Recently, in the "Department for foreign policy and useless bombings", a new director was introduced. It is a well-known person, one of the leading experts in geopolitics and international affairs: Paris Hilton. Her first move was to ensure that every bomb that drops from US planes drops with style. After introducing the world's first designer laser guided bomb named simply Chanel No. 5, Paris continued to promote style in making war too. Now every soldier wears Armani helmets and pink camo, and promotes freedom in those horrible "outfashioned" ex-commie proterrorist antigravitational countries like Canada and Australia.
The USA has a unilateral agreement with the United Kingdom that the UK's military hardware will be used for bombing practice and disposing of excess ordinance, during co-operative military operations. This happens to be the reason that World War II broke out; when Germany noticed that it had experienced 90% losses in training practice with the USA. During the training exercise blacks were used.
Though the United States' new strategy in Iraq has proven effective at routing insurgent rebels, it has done little to relieve the stigma of what many percieve as American imperialism.
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Though the United States' new strategy in Iraq has proven effective at routing insurgent rebels, it has done little to relieve the stigma of what many percieve as American imperialism.
Music
The United States are a clever people (source needed), which is exemplified by the fact that even though there are very poor ghetto areas such as Compton, Buffalo, Fun Central, Queen, and the lost city of Atlanta, the poverty-stricken black people of these areas are very fond of creating music, such as rap, blues, and since Katrina that 'Under the Sea' song from 'The Little Mermaid'. These forms of music are appreciated by people throughout the world, and so the States have managed to import money indirectly from their disgusting poverty levels.
Michael Jackson is also an important figure in American music, having such hits as, Thriller, Man In The Mirror, and I Like Sex With Little Boys. He also performed with R. Kelley on a hit single with in 2000 called I Want To Pee On You. Michael Jackson is a legendary performer, and is widely applauded all over America as having set the world record for molesting more children than any other person, surpassing the record set by Rush Limbaugh in 1982 and tied by Geraldo Rivera in 1997. His Neverland Ranch situated at his underground lair in California is considered the largest pedophilia paradise outside of the jurisdiction of the Land Of Disney, which currently has America and Europe under complete control. In 1989 Michael Jackson became the first African American to become white by voluntary surgical procedure. Michael Jackson's role in American music includes the creation of the National Anthem, titled "God Save My Record Contract".
Due to the increasing number of Mexican Illegal Immigrants entering the United States, the national Anthem has been rewritten and the first words "Oh, Say can you see" have been changed to "José, can you see."
Correction: American music is not mainly "rap", but mainly "crap."
Crime
America's crime rates are very low - the States rank second in North America (north of the Mexican border). These rates, exemplary to the rest of the developed world, are thanks to America's level of personal safety, which is guaranteed by every citizen owning one or more guns.Therefore, the safest place in the USA is Texas. Detroit is also the safest city in America.
An alternative theory has been suggested by crazy scientists that had been drinking too much night. The theory states that: By creating laws, you create criminals, so by removing laws, you eliminate criminals. Therefore there is such a great opposition to gun control, as it will make everyone who owns a gun a criminal. However, this theory has been dismissed as being a freedom conspiracy to make the rest of the world look better.
American crime is very different from other nations, in that their are many different organized gangs that control the provincial lands. The Vice Lords, the 18th Street Gang, the Costra Nostra, the Jackson 5 and the Butthole Banditos are among the most powerful. These gangs are fiercely territorial and engage in such illicit activities such as armed robbery, extortion, voting, backyard liposuctions and manufacturing illegal sugarbabies. They control a vast majority of local governments through the sale of LSD and key lime pie.
The current president George W. Bush is expected to be sentenced to 798 years in a high-security prison shortly after his presidency is over.
Sexuality
Americans are so prudish, they even keep their clothes on when taking a shower. Except for people in the confederacy, who without exception are sexual perverts fascinated with their limitless exertion of power. A woman giving milk to her baby on TV is pornography. A rape scene or a crime scene is entertainment. The President is granted the right, under the 440th amendment to the Constitution, to have sex with any woman he wants. This includes the homeless, vagrants and people in nursing homes. The American people completely support this power, and a poll done in 2001 showed 68% of the American population wanted the president to have sex with them, a clear indication of what a majority of the nation finds sexy. Fat obese women are a staple of the American sexual diet, and it is common to see women who have FUPA's (Fat Upper Pussy Area) protruding from their pants. These are sex robots created by Enron to entice the public to, "Find a fold and fu-k it!"
Education
A sample textbook page
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A sample textbook page
Most American children begin their studies bright and young at 12 years of age. At this point they learn arithmetic, biology and gun safety. The life expectancy for an average public school student is four months after enrollment in the high school system (slightly higher than the life expectancy at Iwojima or Omaha Beach.) To the left is an excerpt taken from a eleventh year American Geography text book, Earth:America and Friends. The publishing company was forced to recall the textbook, due to several complaints of "vary hard homework and lots to think." It was soon replaced with the revised edition, Earth: America.
Several educational commitees representing America's teachers met in 2005 to discuss the required readings for the 2006-2007 semesters from grades 1 through 12. Below is a list of required readings for the juniors (11th grade).
* The Wheels on the Bus
* The Kid's Guide to Money
* Put me in the Zoo
* Bambi
* Go, Dog, Go!
* The Real Mother Goose
* Webster's Thesaurus
Following is a list of books proposed and later rejected by the commitees along with the reasons for rejection.
* The Lord of The Rings Trilogy (Contains one or more words larger than seven letters)
* John Locke's Treatises on Government (Reason for rejection is self explanatory)
* American Geography Textbook (see above)
* Official Rules of Badminton (Contains references to a non-American sport)
The average American IQ is around 76 meaning most Americans can open doors quite easily (sliding doors pose a higher difficulty rating).
Methods of knowing you are in the USA
This is a common American Sex Robot. It has been in use since 1898 and still gets a good run.
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This is a common American Sex Robot. It has been in use since 1898 and still gets a good run.
Main Article: Methods of knowing you are in the USA
1. If you ask where you are they will say "America", and if you ask what's to the south they won't know.
2. Continuous earthquakes (it is San Andreas Fault in California and fat peoples' fault everywhere else)
3. Catching a ball without a ten foot glove is met with cries of amazement.
4. Dumb luck is considered ironic.
5. A nation of immigrants outraged by new immigration is not considered ironic.
6. People scream blue murder when petrol reaches 10 cents a gallon.
7. Petrol evaporates and becomes harmless "Greenhouse Gas".
8. People find it "Niiice to meet you!!!".
9. The closest human contact is a handshake (immediately followed by thorough cleansing of the hands).
10. When you say your country from origin, and they respond with "is that near the wal-mart down 895?".
11. The current president is a monkey.
12. Wal-Mart is the cultural "hang-out spot".
13. When you tell someone you're from Brazil, they ask if you live in a tree and have a pet monkey.
14. Someone shoots you.
15. The average high school student believes that calculus "is when you use calculators."
16. You find a woman that looks like the one on the right. She does not have to look the same, but has to be just as fat.
17. You go to the movies and the guy asks "Would you like butter with your butter flavoured popcorn?"
18. You insist that because someone wears a towel on their head, they have a bomb strapped to them, and so you jump out of the taxi.
19. People think you're a leprechaun when you tell them you're Irish.
20. People keeps telling you that Indonesia is a part of Bali.
21. Racism can only be joked by black people, or "African Americans".
22. People take the elevator to get some much needed exercise.
23. Your leader is a moron.
24. Your moronic leader is chosen by some group of poeple no one has heard of called "The Electoral College."
25. Being well-traveled means you once crossed into the next state.
26. The whiteness of your teeth denotes your value to society.
27. You can't live without arrogance to other nations.
28. You are a living proof of how evolution can go backwards.
29. People burn your flag.
30. You burn Iraq's flag.
31. You think blondes are attractive, while they are really dumb.
32. You start laughing while watching "King of the Hill".
33. You can't watch anime on TV without the onigiris becoming "edible triangles", the guns becoming Nerf guns and the blood becoming Kool-Aid.
34. Every map or globe has an enormous picture of America surrounded by questions marks and the words "here be dragons"
35. Everybody complains about their elected leader but elect him again anyway. But it doesn't matter because all the alternatives are just as bad.(Example,2004 Presidential Election. George Dubya Bush again? Are you a fu-king idiot?)
36. Fat people are considered the same as normal people and are not spat on and hated but are instead celebrated and given awards and television airtime.
37. No-one can put on a realistic foreign accent to save their lives.
38. You couldn't locate Australia on a map for your life.
39. Fried chicken is considered gourmet food.
40. When there are an abnormal amount of retards (especially in Dallas, Texas and Alabama), which is considered normal in the USA.
41. When racism is the law.
42. You got lost in a large farm field,.. 2 seconds later you have a sawed off shotgun in your mouth, and a redneck looking at you while chewing grass
43. You meet someone who thinks 2+2=5.
44. You meet someone who talks like someone in a d!ck and Jane book.
45. You're too stupid to realize that French fries actually originated from Belgium.
46. You cannot distinguish libertine and libertarians.
47. "Freedom of religion" actually means "free to worship the majority religion ONLY."
48. Everyone on the street has a catchphrase. Except you, so everyone laughs about you but not about your jokes. You may also get shot.
49. You write a long article at Uncyclopedia about how rotten the USA is, while getting pissed if people question your patriotism. (See Liberals).
50. Fat people are the porn artists.
51. No one can spell "colour" or "favour" properly . In fact, noone can speel anything.
52. Whenever a foreign country lights up a match you instantly panic.
53. You are completely unable to locate any other country on a map.
54. Your biggest dilemma of the day is "Subway or MacDonalds?"
55. After a pint of beer you feel dizzy, after 2 you feel drunk, after 3 you cant feel anything, after 4 your in hospital.
56. You actually think American brewed beer tastes good.
57. The size of your TV is directly proportional to the amount of debt your in.
58. Nobody has any passion for sport.
59. Everyone is unbelievably passionate about lunch.
60. Lunch is actually called dinner and dinner is called supper.
61. America's Slogan: WE are the World
62. When people look down on hitting your kid when they need it.
Famous Americans
* Capt'n Crunch
* Ronald McDonald
* Mel Gibson
* Sinbad
* King of the Hill
* Homer Simpson
* O.J. Simpson
* Jenny McCarthy
* Carmen Electra
* Steven Spielberg
* Hollywood
http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/America
